The legendary words of Belgium's most notorious butcher, sum up my morning ride very accurately. I gave up the idea that the commute rides could be a form of bicycle training, a long time a ago. There are so many external factors that disturb your ride that you are basically just pushing the pedals without any consideration for cadence, speed or heart rate. Keep the rubber down, and keep away from the four-wheeled death.
Anyway you get used to the blind and or inconsiderate drivers but from time to time there are these exceptions who can still infuriate me to the point where I might (so far I can use the word might) pull him or her from behind the wheel and serve them a can of whoopass.
This morning I got almost driven down three (as in 3) times in a row over a distance of less than 200 meters by the same f*****g blind b***h in a white Mercedes.
Miss c**t pulls out of her parking spot as I pass , near miss number one. Fifty meters further and I turn to the right, just like miss merco, only problem is that she turns so tightly that I almost get hit by her rearview mirror and have to jump my bike on the sidewalk not to get hit. But the last incident a 150 meters further was the straw that broke the camel's back; I am riding on the bicycle lane along the street that turns to the left, this homicidal bitch is coming from behind me and tries to turn to the right, I literally see her right front wheel and front fender almost hit my left pedal.
I brake like a madman, my vision turns black and my heart rate and decibels go up. I hurl a tirade of swearwords at her windshield and continue my way.
Lucky her that she did not get out of her car 'cause I would have made it to the evening news; "Maniac cyclist molests driver and dismantles car".